Monday, August 30, 2010

Causes of Decreased Libido and Desire

Desire dreamsSex is an integral part of human relationships. It can be difficult when one partner has decreased libido and desire , and a lack of sex can put a damper on any relationship. While some people make a claim that sex is not important in a relationship, even the Christian bible speaks of sex as something that a man and wife must do to keep their relationship alive.With sex being such an important aspect of our relationships and marriages, it is important to explore the reasons why decreased libido and desire occurs so that a solution to the problem can be found.

Decreased Libido And Desire - Relationship Issues

A marriage is like a rollercoaster (as is any relationship), and there are ups and downs. You may go through a dry patch with your spouse where you do not make love as often as you used to. There may not be any medical cause for this decreased libido and desire but lifestyle or aging. If one spouse is working nights and the other is working days, that lifestyle may not be conducive to making love. This is even more so if you have children. Many married couples find it easy to be physically intimate after the children go to bed. If one spouse is working nights that often makes it impossible to find alone time to make love. In addition, aging is another very common cause of decreased libido and desire . As our bodies age the sex drive often decreases. Some people find taking medication helps them to remain active with their sexuality while others simply go with the natural changes in life.

There are other common and non medical causes for a decreased libido and desire . Having a baby can wreak havoc on a new mother's body image. If your wife does not feel comfortable in her own skin, it may be very difficult for her to make love to you. She feels different as her body has changed through childbirth, and she may be embarrassed or ashamed of her new body.

In addition, having a new baby means lack of sleep and added stress. If a husband and wife are exhausted and stressed out at the end of the day, sex is the last thing on their mind.

Finally, breastfeeding can also decrease libido and desire. A fun part of sex, the breasts, is now off limits. That can turn many men and women off. In addition, breastfeeding makes the walls of the vagina very smooth which can lead to painful sex. Even if the new mother does not suffer from a decreased libido and desire , she will most likely need lubricant to make sex comfortable for her.

Another common cause for decreased libido and desire is relationship blues. If one or both parties in the relationship are not happy, it is a high possibility that the sex drive will be very low or nonexistent. The key to having a healthy sex life is to have a healthy and happy relationship to begin with.

Decreased Libido And Desire - Medical And Drug Issues

Other common causes for decreased libido and desire stem from medical and drug issues. Certain illnesses and the medication that one must take with these illnesses can cause a decrease in sex drive. While this does not bother some people, if it is bothersome you may want to consult your caregiver to see if there is another medication you can take for your problem. Sometimes, however, the choice must be made between being healthy and well and not having a sex drive and having a sex drive but suffering from your illness. A caring partner should want you to make the former choice.

In addition to prescription drugs, illegal drugs—as well as alcohol—can cause a decreased libido and desire . Illegal drugs destroy your body and your function, so it is natural that excessive use of drugs like cocaine and heroin would decrease your sex drive. Some illegal substances have been known to enhance the sexual experience, but it is temporary and certainly not worth the long term risk of a decreased sex drive.

There are many reasons why you may experience a decreased libido and desire . If you are concerned, make an appointment with your caregiver to discuss your options for treatment.
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Monday, August 9, 2010

If You Desire Something Enough, The Universe Will Deliver It

my desire secretsThere is a philosophy going around that if you desire something enough in a positive way, and you visualize it continually the universe will deliver the fruits of that desire.

There are some instances depicted where a man really wants something like a new sports car and he meditates on it (don't try this!), sees it in his minds eye, tries it out in his imagination, surrounds himself with picture of it, etc; and lo a behold this sports car manifests one day on the gross plane and he is able to possess the object of his desire. Of course possessing the object of your material desire does not give you happiness. Does the universe fulfill all your desire secrets if the desires are strong enough?

There is an interesting word "synchronicity", which means that events that are not causally related (one event being the cause of the other) occur together by the action of some unknown (in this case the universe) factor. Sometimes we are speaking about someone else, and at the same time the person calls on the phone. That would be an example of synchronicity.

How to explain this through the lens of Vedic knowledge?

The universe is not unconscious nor it a big genie responding to everyone's wishes, nor is it impersonal energy responding to our mental energetic radiation! We know that behind all the universal functions there is Krishna as the creator, lawgiver, overseer, proprietor, universal Super soul, individual Super soul, etc. So, in other words "not a blade of grass moves without the will of the Supreme Personality of Godhead."

Also there are 33 million demigods who control the universe under Krishna's direction. So, why does it seem that when people desire things with great intensity and they meditate on the fruits of their desire, the universe responds to their desires? Srila Prabhupada explains this nicely in a purport:

And so, when the living entity is bewildered in his desires, the Lord allows him to fulfill those desires, but the Lord is never responsible for the actions and reactions of the particular situation, which may be desired. Being in a bewildered condition, therefore, the embodied soul identifies him with the circumstantial material body and becomes subjected to the temporary misery and happiness of life. The Lord is the constant companion of the living entity as Paramatma, or the Super soul, and therefore He can understand the desires of the individual soul, as one can smell the flavor of a flower by being near it. Desire is a subtle form of conditioning for the living entity. The Lord fulfills his desire, as he deserves: Man proposes and God disposes. The individual is not, therefore, omnipotent in fulfillinghis desires. The Lord, however, can fulfill all desires, and the Lord, being neutral to everyone, does not interfere with the desires of the minute independent living entities. Purport Bg 5.15

In other words if one is functioning under the laws of Karma one has a certain stock of good karma and a certain stock of bad karma. The good karma we can compare to a positive balance in our bank account. When we have a strong desire to buy something, at a certain point that desire motivates us to take the money out of our bank account so that we can purchase the item. In the same way when we have a strong desire to get something in this world, Krishna as the Super soul is aware of this, and this desire is fulfilled, if (and this is a big if) we have enough good karma in our bank account. Now, when we take the good karma out of our karmic bank account, the amount of good karma in our karmic bank account is reduced by the amount of the withdrawal. So after some time there will be no more good karma left and we can desire till the cow jumps over the moon, but there will be no response. What about the devotee's desires? A devotee has no bad or good karma.

All karma bad and good is eradicated even by namabhasa chanting. Krishna reciprocates with devotee's desires, but he will only fulfill those desires that are helpful to the devotee's spiritual progress. So, it is important for devotees to have proper desires and the stronger the devotional desire is the quicker that desire will be fulfilled.

What is a desire? A desire is something you really want with your heart and soul. Of course there are degrees of intensity of desires. When someone wants something with great intensity that is called intense greed. Prabhupada describes this intense greed for pure devotional service as the "best path available."

How do we develop this intense greed? In the material world greed is developed by the process of thinking, feeling and willing. In other words we think of something (take some food like pizza for example). The more we think about that sense object the more we get attached to it. Then we begin to feel that object of our senses. In the case of pizza we begin to salivate and almost taste it as we are visualizing our interacting with that object. Then the stage of willing comes where the desire is so intense, we act.

If we are negative we are meditating on a negative and this is what we will get-a negative. In other words if we are contemplating giving up this or not thinking about that we will develop a stronger attachment to this or that by that negative contemplation.

After contemplation of Krishna in a positive way we enter the stage of feelings. What does that mean? We picture ourselves the way we want to be.

We need to develop an intense internal vision and an intense external (the entire world taking up Krishna consciousness) vision of Krishna consciousness. These wishes will come true. Krishna will fulfill them. When our meditation/vision is harmonious with Krishna's desires, success is sure.
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Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Use These Powerful Law Of Attraction Tips To Attract Your Desires!

Whether you are aware of it or not, the law of attraction is constantly affecting your life. Unfortunately, if you dont control your feelings and your thoughts, which send messages to the Universe in the form of vibrations, this law is not likely working in your favor much of the time. You can change that, though, if you follow some basic (but powerful) law of attraction tips. By doing so, you can begin to attract the things you want in your life, such as wealth, love, or even your dream car. This article discusses two powerful law of attraction tips to help you.

Know Exactly What You Do Want

One of the most important law of attraction tips anyone can give you is this: you need to be crystal clear regarding what you want to attract into your life. Typically, when people first hear about the law of attraction, they write down everything they want. Their list usually includes things like to have lots of money, or to fall in love, etc.

The problem is, those are rather vague desires, and vague doesnt work when it comes to law of attraction tips. For example, lots of money to one person may be several hundred dollars, whereas for someone else, it may be millions of dollars. And the Universe cant tell the difference!

If your idea of lots of money is in the millions, youre probably not going to be thrilled with a hundred extra dollars every two months! So, for this first of the law of attraction tips, it is essential that you understand that being vague just wont work.

Clarity regarding your desires is a key factor in all law of attraction tips. You have to be really specific, so the Universe can know precisely what you want to attract. If its lots of money, then state exactly how much. If it is to fall in love, then describe that relationship that perfect partner in detail. You are much more likely to attract your desires when you are very clear and specific.

Picture it in Your Mind, Tapping into All Your Senses

Visualizing your desires as if they were all in your life today not tomorrow or next year is one of the most effective law of attraction tips. However, when most people visualize, they just create a mental picture. The only sense they use is sight. They see what they want, but they dont also imagine how it feels to the touch, or how it smells, or sounds, or tastes. The more you can tap into all of your senses (as well as your emotions) when you visualize, the better!

For example, lets say you really want to attract your dream home. When you picture it in your mind, dont just focus on what it would look like. Imagine what the steps feel like as you walk up them towards the door. When you open the door, imagine how your new home would smell? What sounds would you hear? Would there be music playing? Or a fire crackling in the fireplace? What would the furniture feel like when you sit on it? How would the dinner your cooked in your dream kitchen taste? These law of attraction tips work best when you engage all your senses!

The more law of attraction tips you can learn, the better. However, the two law of attraction tips discussed here are two of the most powerful. If you apply them regularly in your life, you will find yourself attracting your desires more readily than you ever thought possible!
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